Aug 24, '07
Now that the blogs out here are picking up and the scene's looking healthier than it did about a month or two ago, I do not want to write any more because initially I had joined this place to read and occasionally comment on other people's ramblings. And honestly, thinking up something to write about, at random, can be quite hellish. But here's something I'd written a long while back but felt it insubstantial to post and way too lengthy, but decided to post it anyway..what the hell. Read if, like me, you have too much time and too little to do or pretend to be doing.
A little unusual, I thought, when I'd bumped into this idea in a blog, at another website quite some time back. It was a list of all the things the blogger hated. Yes, the infamous but therapeutic hate list. Most people do not like writing about what they dislike on the internet, since there could be unsparing, insensitive people reading up. And then things could get ugly, egos might wobble, programme codes could be written and sent, and as a result, computer hard disks could go to the dogs. But Fropper is safe I sense! It's not hate in the context of the hatred for our corrupt government officials or Ekta Kapoor or crimes or the potholes on the road or even a Emraan Hashmi. Those are too well acknowledged, serious and widely hated to even require a mention. I mean those odd things that are uniquely hated by you.
You might absolutely abhor Big B's overplayed voice but you can't really tell anyone because everyone is in love with him. Type it out here, let it go. Say, there are days when you feel that someone you know is the most dense and the foulest specimen of elephant turd you have ever been around. You can't share that fireball-like info with anyone (word could get around and lead to a long, undesired confrontation with that very same turd!) All that negative energy will build up and suffocate you someday. So let the feelings flow out here, we Fropper folks never tell.(We are too busy hitting, begging strangers to add us and thinking up emotionally-fulfilling, soul-soothing but mind-numbing essays(scraps) on how, why, who and what friendship's all about! busy! busy!) So honestly, we'll never tell!
If you hold in your annoyance, the eventual raging flight will follow wherein you vent it verbally and physically out on people and inanimate objects like your keyboard or mouse, the door, the telephone, the vase, the glass of water\liquor in your hand etc. This is not a sensible way of de-stressing. It does not speak well at all, of your sense of logic, common sense, wisdom and even of your mental development. Let us leave behind physical violence and loud, angry voices solely to the ignorant, wild jackasses who are sexually frustrated and hence retarded. You can't help it if you are one.
Writing down your negative feelings, on the other hand, is as good as going to a therapist and pouring your hearts filth out. It does help knowing that someone else, be it a stranger, is reading about the things that drive you up the wall. Though it won't help much if the comments you receive do not empathize and those choir-like, insincere but supportive comments won't really do you any good either. And sadly you won't exactly turn into this ray of puppy dog sunshine after making the list. But..
But there are some benefits. Like the next time something you hate which is already in your list, comes your way, you can feel good about yourself, knowing how perceptive and insightful you were to have included it. Even better, if you find something/someone new that boils your blood, you can get all excited that you have another point to throw in. Whatever you hate will bring you an odd kind of pleasure. Hating will turn into a good and positive thing to do. The more things you hate the longer your list, the longer the list the better you know yourself. The better you know yourself the less likely you are to whine on and on, all day long, and repel your near and dear ones by coming across as someone who urgently needs to gulp down a month's prescription of laxatives and sedatives together, in one shot. Your mood might improve, a bit maybe.(not very convincing?)
Oh I haven't started jotting down mine as yet, but believe me I will need to make one someday. There is something about making a list that puts me off. So much work! I hate work. There! I've started on the right foot. By the way, that list I'd read on that person's blog had some 1000 plus things. How happy can she ever be? Shocking and seems tedious but yours needn't be so. It just needs to be very specific, like don't tell us you hate your job or your boss, specify what is it exactly that you hate about them. It will help you realize whether your hatred is justified and hence you are to be glorified by Fropperites OR you are just an irritable and pompous piece of ..God?! (..that was close!). Do remember to creatively exaggerate each point for the amusement of the readers. A few examples (accompanied with vague advice for your list). I hate..
-Sidhu. the cricketer turned freakshow. The good news is you don't have to give any reason why you hate something\someone, for example, as in this case, my 'please-lose-your-vocal-cords-now' wrath is overwhelmingly dumbfounding for me to explain why I hate him! (what irony!)
-Shekar Suman thinking he still has a chance. Start with entertainment sleaze, it's always interesting.
-Lizard poop. Well poop from all sources is loathsome but this reptile believes my table is its potty. Oh yeah! there is just no place like home to start with your hate list, probably will be the longest part of the list for most folks- include your annoying, judgment passing, money borrowing, 100 questions in one second asking, rumor inventing relatives and acquaintances..but beware of family\real friends who know your Fropper life..unless that is what you want! A gas leak in hell.
-Those huge cockroaches that can fly..they are universally hated. I think spiders are more decent, they never fly and target you. Eww!
-Out here at Fropper (there must be something you hate about this heavenly abode, come on now.. grow up! get cranky!) I tend to dislike people who describe themselves as cute, sweet, simple, honest, fun loving, generous, affectionate, funny and interesting. I guess I feel the odds are they are just the reverse of the aforesaid.
General people stuff I hate..
-People who lie and then continue to lie even after they know that you know they are lying.(that bites!)
-People who can talk about their hair for more than five whole minutes. I know a dozen.
Unfortunately for me, 'conversations' is my favorite yuck-dom topic!
-Really long, twisted explanations to simple yes-or-no-answer questions. You might as well forget the point, the worth and the question itself. "Okaaaay! We shall look forward to your answer in the afterlife" That would include all those really long rants that are not entertaining, add nothing new, serve no one and could have been kindly made brief in a line or two.
(oh and..this post is NOT my rant okay.. how dare you!?)
-Failed attempts at conversations and the long silence in between deliberate attempts at conversing. Just plain horrible.Like in that song by James "Say something, say something ANYTHING! your silence is deafening!..give me a sign!"
I can't think up any more points. I guess I am just not a hater. I've a tendency to feed on and enjoy contempt(whatever that means) But hope you got the point and will be able to get right at it. Please do start with your list and send it to me when you are done. I love a good 'sulky' read.
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