May 02, '08
Todna toote hua dil ka bura hota hai…………
Yes! Finally summer has come and I can feel the warmth and brightness all-round. Adventurous people are shedding cloths and me my thoughts, at last, by deciding to come out of my cocoon……………. And the credit goes to, who else but Dagny, yes dear it’s you and your blogs, which had been touching me right there, deep inside. Thanks to you, for churning my emotions and thoughts, the out-come of which is this blog. It’s my first sincere attempt to pen down in public, though writing a dairy is a ritual. Many times I had the urge to write, but then on second thought, wondered why and what’s the necessity. But, now I believe that it does hold some meaning. Thus this sequel to Dag’s blog, Koi jab tumhara hriday tod de………. Link of which is provided below.
It’s a bright summer morning. Ujjwala had just finished her morning household marathon and decided to relax while sipping a mongo drink when the phone rang. She looked at the coo-coo clock it’s 10 past 10 a.m, who could it be and why is it that she is having this sinking feeling. She felt a sudden acceleration in her heart rate as well….. she picked up the phone “Hello! Ujjwala speaking” As the person on the other end spoke one could clearly read her facial expressions and the emotions changing from pleasant surprise to disbelief and then into shock and finally the emotions gave way to tears…….. she said bye and hanged the phone and sank in the couch hiding her face in her hand.
The call was from her childhood friend, Amita, they had not spoken since last 6yrs, not that they didn’t wanted to, it was just that they both were busy with their own life. Amita persuading her career and Ujjwala, deciding to start a family. The last time they met, was on Ujjwala’s wedding day. Amita seemed happy and content. Every minute she would flash a million dollar smile that would melt everyone’s heart. It wasn’t that she didn’t have any problem/worry on earth but she wouldn’t display it. She, would rather brush all her sorrows under the carpet and lead a happy life. The only person who knew what’s behind that smile was her friend Ujjwala to whom she would always pour her heart out. It was not that Ujjwala was some kind of agony aunt to Amita. They had shared so many happy moments together laughing on silly jokes, checking out new restaurants, movies etc. But this was last thing that Ujjawala wanted to hear form her. The rest of the day she couldn’t concentrate on her work, she found herself constantly thinking about her. Finally at the end of the while retiring to bed she sat down to shoot a letter her way.
Dear Amita,
It was a pleasant surprise to hear your sweet voice after almost 6yrs. But, soon the pleasant surprise was taken away by the harsh reality of life. You reminded me of those days when I took the decision to say NO to my then fiancé. It was the most difficult and harsh decision which I had taken till date as you know, how difficult it is for me to say that word. But you had given me the courage to stand by my decision and to read between the lines and call a spade a spade. “How can we allow anyone to rule over us and treat us like door mats and puppets” That used to be your punch line then. Though I have never said you this, as there was no need to do so, then, but today I would like to thank you for providing me the strength and courage (though not directly) to say that two letter word and break off and a start afresh. Had it not been because of your harsh and realistic views about life, I would still had been leading an unworthy life. You, might be wondering why, am I digging the past and reliving it again. Well, there is a need, if only you can see it, as, I found you to be not in your true self. The Amita whom I knew all these years, seem to me, has lost her sight of life due to the moisture in her eyes. After all 15 yrs is not a short span of time. Especially when a relationship which has been surviving on the very stones called trust and faith and that very stone is shaken to the core by an intruder. There is least that any one can do ……..
Always remember, every person who comes into our life does so with a purpose/reason and that relation last until the reason is fulfilled.
Ours is a relation without any reason.
Ujjwala