Fropper.com Blogs – Free Blogging

I type with all ten fingers!!!

Mar 04, '10

The moment of truth!

Dedicated to kindred spirits! A feel-good factor to the ‘pleasantly plump’!

Enlightenment doesn’t always happen under ‘bodhi’ trees! A common place, non-descript stool is suffice to bring knowledge and awareness, the kind you wouldn’t have ever dreamt of! And that’s what I experienced, on a sultry early-summer evening, in a small boutique of sorts, tucked away in a corner of the sleepy town of Jabalpur!

My friend and I stepped into this ‘boutique of sorts’, to get my blouses stitched. She had assured me that ‘Lata’ is the best seamstress that inhabited planet Earth. Hailing from a small town myself, I had my secret faith in the surprising professionalism shown by some of the people who’ve had a limited exposure to the fashion industry; a few of them have managed to stun me with their charming and elegant patterns.

So there we were, hands clutching a bag of material, hearts laden with hopes and eyes reflecting excitement! The girl, (or was she a woman?), was engaged with a customer; she smiled and nodded in welcome, and waved her

hand in a gesture that directed us to have a seat. We found three contraptions there to choose from, one made of steel and two of plastic.

When we initially took our seat, she choosing the steel and me the plastic, our minds recognized and registered them for what they were known as---stools! It was a while later, after we had plonked our um---er-----broad bases on those measly stools with such meager space, waiting for Lata to attend on us and then spending the best part of an hour discussing desings with her, I started talking of them as ‘those damn bloody contraptions’! ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Should I shed my inhibitions here and mention that we belong to the ‘few extra pounds’ category? And that we found it extremely uncomfortable to continue occupying those contraptions that barely accommodated one-fifth of our surface areas? LOL

Soon my friend was grumbling, mumbling and swearing at the torture she was subjected to; she was out of her seat in a trice, and moved on to the only other choice of seating she had, which was the second plastic contraption. I gave her an all-too knowing look that said, ‘all the best baby, that doesn’t help either’! I didn’t voice my sentiments though; not only was she sure of finding better comfort, but also she was cursing herself under her breath for choosing the steel contraption that looked like a flat steel plate that had suffered an arsenal attack, leaving it curled downwards on all sides, resembling an overgrown toadstool! I let her chastise herself to her heart’s

content and allowed her to find pleasure in her newfound wisdom; I knew it would be short lived and the bubble would burst soon enough! And it did!

For a while she looked smug and happy. Soon the ass started feeling the pinch of a slightly pinched availability of space! ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa We didn’t get flustered, though. We entertained ourselves with a stimulating and scintillating conversation on ‘body space and surface areas’, laughing

away to glory at our one-liners and quips! Thank God a thousand times for our creatively inclined brains!

Long after we reached home too we were giggling and grumbling alternatively, reflecting on those contraptions! She threw a question at us, ‘What’s the moral of the story’? And answered it herself, ‘Time to cut down on all the extra flab, so you could fit into a teeny-weeny stool in a teeny-weeny boutique’. That’s when I had this divine intervention; a sense of ‘eureka’ proportionately interspersed with a dose of ‘nirvana’ that descended upon me with such cosmic force and led me to the ‘moment of truth’ of my mundane human life. I gave her what I considered a beatific smile and enunciated, ‘No baby; the moral of the story is to go to a bigger boutique with bigger seating

contraptions; where interior designers fit itsy-bitsy plastic stools exclusively in bathrooms’! Oh my! Doesn’t it nearly sound like, ‘------And thus spake CJ’?
ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Tags:

29 Comment(s) |

Share | Permalink [?] |

Rating:

[ Votes: 5 ]

Feb 25, '10

From the Pages of CJ's Journal - 1! Of potatoes and carpets!

From the Pages of CJ’s Journal – 1
Of Potatoes and Carpets!

It was yet another of the numerous arguments I have with Amma.

Me: Oh no Amma; please, don’t trouble me so!

Amma: I’m not troubling you, am I? All I’m asking you to do is, clean those vegetables thoroughly!

Me: But I’ve already washed them twice! Under RUNNING water too!

Amma: But did you use the brush? Ahhhhhh! I see you haven’t!

The vegetables under question were potatoes; fresh, brown-skinned, dirt-covered potatoes dad had fetched from the market! And the brush in question? Amma actually has this funny contraption, that she found when she was visiting my sister in the US of A. It looks like a toothbrush of sorts, except that it’s longer and thicker by a few inches; and has a thick bush of bristles at one end and a thinner version of it at the other end.

When you plan to cook potatoes in their skin, you don’t do a cursory wash-job; well, you don’t do a cursory job, ever, in anything that you do! That’s Amma’s golden principle No: 1. So what do we do with those blessed potatoes?

· Pile them up in a broad, shallow vessel.
· Rinse them loosely under running water and drain water completely.
· Wash them again under running water, this time, with a little more care, rubbing your hands all over the surface of the potatoes, concentrating as you would when you wash babies’ bottoms! Drain water completely. Even a drop of water is not allowed to remain in the vessel.
· Then comes the brush! Scrub each and every potato with the thick bristles until they shine and sparkle!
· Run a microscopic glance over the potatoes and make sure to use the thinner side of the handy brush to remove any foreign looking speck on the surface of the potatoes!
· Repeat step 2 and 3 with the same precision, attention and in the same order!
· Run a microscopic glance over the potatoes once again, rolling them over and over in the vessel to ensure that there’s no errant dirt or infectious particle left clinging to the skin. (If there is such dirt or particle, then repeat the ‘underwater treatment’ on the ‘culprit’ potato)
· Check, double check and triple check for any remnants of dirt (real or imagined!) Repeat this process alternating with the ‘underwater treatment’ until the potatoes individually pass the microscopic test!
· Now, and ONLY now do the potatoes get qualified to be cut and cooked!

But isn’t this just one of Amma’s idiosyncrasies? From the hand-hemmed square bits of cloth(stitched by her and no one else) she places on water dispensers to absorb water, right up to the soaped, washed and rinsed used carry bags, that are hung out on the clothes line in neat order, she has many an unwritten rule on house-keeping!

Appa is not to be outdone, is he? I remember a cozy evening, when we were gathered in front of the TV, watching a nail-biting thriller of a match. I was swinging my foot to and fro, idly watching Harbajan Singh bowling a deliberate spin to a snooty Aussie player, when my foot hit something hard and I cried out, ‘ouch’!

I looked down, but saw only the carpet under my feet and nothing that accounted for the hardness that hit my foot. It was still smarting, and so I bent down to examine further. As I ran my hand over the corners of the carpet, I was taken aback when I felt something as hard as iron! I lifted the edge of the carpet and flipped it. And my jaw dropped!

There was this bit of L-shaped iron rod, about 3-4 inches on both sides of the L, stitched meticulously to the underside of the beautiful, intricately woven carpet! I looked up to see a smugly smiling set of parents! They sensed my question even before I worded it. Dad said, ‘you see Chithra, in every house these carpets are cared for only so far in dusting and airing them; nobody does anything about the dog-eared edges; I thought this is a good idea to prevent the carpet from curling up at the edges and causing people to trip over it’!

I puffed up with pride. What a scientific dad! Then I asked him how he went about it. He said he had the ironsmith instructed as to the requirement with exact measurement and had them made to order! Then I came out with the inevitable question: ‘Who stitched them on’? Amma casually piped in, ‘I did it; but it was no big deal; Appa had already ensured that there were tiny holes made along the sides of the L-shaped rod and I was able to sew them on in no time’!

They do make quite a pair!!!

Well, that’s how they have always been, haven’t they? All tasks are to be approached with scientific and logical base, and executed with geometric precision!

Need I say that I’ve been the black sheep? The clumsy oaf? The butter fingers? I’ve never learnt to sew a button on a vest! And never understood why potatoes have to be cleaned with a brush! ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Tags:

17 Comment(s) |

Share | Permalink [?] |

Rating:

[ Votes: 5 ]

Feb 17, '10

Pissed-Off!!!

Pissed-Off!

Remember Kamalahan’s box-office hit, Pushpak? It wasn’t a significant beginning of a phase of scatological humour, but it certainly marked an upward influx on the graph, in terms of the frequency and unpleasantness in the employ of such details. Though the movie was unique and entertaining, and maintained the tempo throughout, culminating in a well-cinematized climax, I couldn’t shrug away the sense of disgust at the innumerable scenes featuring washrooms, rest rooms, pee and shit!

I’ve always felt that Kamalahasan had a penchant for such scenes, which were repeatedly a part of many of his films. But soon

he wasn't alone; he had company; big time! With a vehemence that couldn’t be missed out, other artists and directors took to scatological humour as well, leaving a trail of an odour so obnoxious!

The writers weren’t to be left far behind! Comics, stories, articles – name it, and you had it! Stand up comedians attracted a more-than-willing and interested audience, who went rolling on the floor laughing at the mention of toilets, pee and shit!

It seemed to be a compulsion, an obsession, and the most in-thing to talk about! And continues to be so!

Why did I take so long to vent my spleen on it? The recent run-away success of Amir Khan’s ‘3 idiots’ brought to surface what had comfortably been lying forgotten, in the folds of memory. Oh

yes, I loved the movie too, for its message, and had as good a laugh as the others; but again, I couldn’t help but feel disgusted at the scenes featuring peeing with a pronounced regularity and repeated-ness throughout the length of the almost three-hour screenplay.

Psychologists have a theory on toddlers’ peeing and potty patterns; they say that the child who’s grown up enough to inform the mother of its need to visit the loo, at times pee the pants to draw attention. This is called ‘dirtying the nappy’! But that’s obviously a theory that spoke of toddlers, not adults!

My sister tells me that this is a sure, never-failed-once medium of getting my brother-in-law to break into uninhibited laughter! Wonder what makes him tick!

Primary school boys are tickled pink by the mention of words such as pee and shit; but that I guess could be put down to a growing up process; just like the adolescent blushes at the sight of the opposite sex! But adults? Fully-grown, mature adults, indulging in repulsive conversations in the name of comedy is way beyond my comprehension and tolerance!

So, why this? Has media run out of creativity that it has to depend on slapstick comedy and cheap humour to entertain the masses? Or have the masses grown so gross in their taste and appreciation of humour? Or is it some kind of ‘attention drawing syndrome’ in the perverted minds of the entertainers? Or have we as a ‘race’ been stunted; not growing or developing into adults? Or is it a casual ‘chalta hai’ attitude

that overlooks finer aesthetic aspects such as discretion, social niceties and political correctness? Or a blatant leniency in the rulebook of the censor board?

For I don’t think I can attribute it to something as lofty as liberation of thoughts, freedom of expression and open-mindedness!

ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Breaking news:

Latest on commercials: sudoku toilet papers! Just imagine the queue waiting outside toilets! ---I shudder-------------

Not a joke buddies; go check in the market!

while at it -------One for the road:

What did one bum tell the other bum?

Ans: With the amount of shit that has passed between us, I’m surprised that we’re still together!

Tags:

37 Comment(s) |

Share | Permalink [?] |

Rating:

[ Votes: 4 ]

Dec 21, '09

Will he? Won't he?

Disclaimer: This is a special disclaimer (actually an attention claimer! ) to staytuned! I'm jumping in the fray with a war cry buddy! I do love all the men in my life, but at the moment, in a mood to go all cribby and whiny about them! ha haaaaaaaaaaa

Will he? Won't he?

So much for my age, experience and worldly wisdom, I never seem to learn certain aspects of life! I'm at my inefficient best when I try to understand why the men in my life have a set pattern when it comes to making and returning calls! Graham Bell wouldnt have had the slightest notion that his invention would one day be so powerful and all encompassing! He's probably turning in his grave!

And so much for my professional standing too! Do I read them wrong? Or do the species from Mars speak a different tongue? Maybe it sounds the same but means different? Going by the English that I've picked up through my convent breeding and copious reading, when someone says, 'I'll call you back' or 'I'll call you in a while', I expect a call. 'In a while' may be a relative time expression, but I still expect a call at least by EOD! But even after the cows are home, the call never comes through!

And when I say 'men in my life', I start from my Dad! That wonderful, adorable, charming septuagenarian is the boon of my life, no doubt, but by the theory of relativity, he's at times the bane too! Come evening, he's happily ensconced in front of the TV, watching 'soaps' with my Mom. 'I'm spending quality time with my beloved' is his line of defense! Woe betides me if I call him at such an hour! With half an eye and ear on the TV, he gives me such insipid responses that I'd be forced to disconnect the call!

Or else he'd be so busy with something or someone, that he'd just come online and tell me, 'I'm a bit busy, I'll call you later'! And later has no specific time frame, does it? How convenient!

My cousin, always comes up with the most polite and sweet sounding words. Akka, I'm just

setting out on a trek, I'll call you soon'. And soon has no specific time frame, does it? How convenient!

'Soon'er or 'late'r, it's the same story! ha haaaaaaaaaa

Sonny boy is no exception! When I'm away on training assignments, I call him, only to hear his hurried 'ma, I'll call you sometime; I'm going out to play now'! Sometime doesn't have a specific time frame, does it? How convenient!

My friends and special characters are as exasperating! There's this 'honeybunch sugar' who's so wonderful till it comes to calls! And then he freaks me out! If I don't receive or return your call, you should realize that I'm tied up'. And he'd promise to call when he was free. And 'when he was free' could be at any point in time; no specifics there, either, are there? How convenient!

Not just over the phone, even on chat, theyre equally ------um-------er-------------casual! (mildly put, of course)!

I was once chatting with a friend. He said, 'wait' and I was ----------ing! 1800 seconds later, I logged off, called him up and said, 'I waited this long and then I logged off'! Can you imagine what he said! 'Oh, I forgot! I'm sorry, I just got involved in something'! So, had I been waiting, I'd have continued waiting till the second coming of Christ! ha haaaaaaaaaaa

No point in wondering if the network has connectivity; no point in checking the mobile time and again if it's on silent mode and if you've perhaps missed the call; no point in losing sleep over it; no point staring at the phone and willing it to ring; no point trying to send out telepathic messages! They'd call, only when it's convenient to them. Convenient to them has a broad spectrum of definition! Convenient means, 'no other work; no football/cricket/news to watch; not siesta time; not meal time; no friends around; nothing to do'! And then I get a call.

Why are they so casual? Why do they dismiss the issue with just a shrug of the shoulders? Why is it never a big deal for them?

Siggggggghhhhhhhhhhh Questions as old as time! And will remain questions till telephones exist! Men are born to be hunters and never to be the hunted! And therefore by default women play the part of the 'prey'! ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

But haven't we learnt nice and early that men are indeed from Mars? And Venus has only limited access to Mars! A singular lack of communication skills seems to be the highlight of whatever language that is spoken by the

Martians! ha haaaaaaaaaaaaa Do you think I could train them in language skills? The language of expression and precision?

Tags:

40 Comment(s) |

Share | Permalink [?] |

Rating:

[ Votes: 7 ]

Dec 13, '09

Global 'Cold'ing!

Global ‘Cold’ing!

One of the top ten, ever potent, never answered questions: Who or what is the supreme force that wields a wand over the Universe? You may be familiar with different names like God, Nature and the likes of it. But didn’t you know that in power politics, the chair passes through various hands at periodic intervals?

The current ruling deity across the spectrum of the Universe is ‘Rhinovirus’( picture to the immediate left) the cause and perpetrator of the ‘common cold’. The Rhinovirus hails from

the family of ‘Picornovirus’ and shares a lineage with ‘Human Parainfluenza and Influenza Viruses’, including the Swine famed H1N1!

It has to be the greatest ‘Omnipresent, Omnipotent and the Omniscient’! Test it! Start by calling someone in India; move on to various parts of India, Urban, Rural, Central, Remote, East, West, South-East, North-West – as many places as possible; further on to foreign countries, Europe, Australia, countries, continents ---------- I’ll bet my bottoms you’re sure to hear most of them speaking to you in a tone that sounds like their noses had been soaked in iced water for twenty four hours – nasal, hoarse and rasping!

The virus announces its arrival with aplomb – with a resounding and resonating ‘sneeze’! Sneezes are interesting in their manifestation. ‘Atishooooooooooooooooooo’ – this is the long

drawn variety that escapes with a super plosive quality, almost causing an earthquake effect in the body of the virus infested homosapien and a near quake effect in the surroundings! ‘Atish, Atish, Atish, Atish, Atish, Atishh’ – this is the mega serial style – the sneeze coming out in short, stunted flow of air with a lot of friction, producing a series of ‘pop’ sounds as that of a toy bullet being released from a toy gun, the plastic variety that kids buy in local fairs and exhibitions!

‘Atsh’ – a single, short release of air, sudden in its arrival, brief in its duration and surprising in

its quietness; maybe termed the ‘virgin’ sneeze, as it seems very hesitant to open up and keeps itself cloistered!
ha haaaaaaaaaaaa

And thus having encroached upon alien territory, the virus loses no time in getting an ‘at home’ feeling; the entire body is taken over quite unceremoniously! It has never undergone training in basic etiquette! Like the silly ‘tickling’ game it plays at the throats of the victims! Gali mein kich kich game! It probably never realizes that while it puts itself into an extremely cushioned environment, it throws the victims out of their own comfort levels! Tut tut! How rude!

And the sneezes are without fail followed by a most embarrassing phenomenon, ‘the running nose’! The best ever example you can give for the expression, ‘nuisance value’! The sneezes are then shifted from ‘Atishoo’ to ‘A tissue’! And if a tissue is not handy, then it becomes an ‘issue’!

Whether on buses, in meetings, at work, during play – the nose just doesn’t learn to behave itself; sadly lacks in social graces! Bah! A tissue has to be held against it without respite. Those

who are not in the habit of using tissues or handkerchiefs, use their hands involuntarily and oblivious of the ‘yukkiness’ involved! The others around squirm in their seats and throw disgusting glances at the victims; glances that go unnoticed of course! The victim is busy transferring goo from his nose to his outfit, or to the undersides of the furniture that’s nearest, some carelessly foisting on the sticky substance, and some surreptitiously!

The clichéd belief that a cold gets cured in a week with medication and in 7 days without medication holds a lot of water to this day! So, what can’t be cured, must be endured! And we can perhaps take it beyond mere endurance! Make the most out of a dire situation!

A few games and sporting activities could be developed based on this. For instance, ‘gargle gag’; the one who gargles warm salt water, longest and with the greatest noise, wins! Those who have a chronic case of common cold could be the most eligible for this activity. As it is a global syndrome, this could be added to National Games and the Olympics as well!

Another game could be ‘ The Redness Ratio’! Haven’t you noticed the skin turning red and resembling a boiled beet, when you’ve been through a couple of steam inhaling sessions to beat the cold? The cold doesn’t get beaten so easily, but the skin gets reddened! This redness ratio could be monitored and measured with a suitable instrument. Scientists could be set the task of inventing one with maximum accuracy and minimum lapses!

A third game may be ‘Tissue Economy’! How efficiently, effectively and economically does a person use tissues during common cold? Did you know that the first cost cutting that was done by organizations to beat recession was to cut down on the tissues in the rest rooms and washrooms? So wouldn’t it be a great idea to practice economy, as it’s the most excruciating need of the hour?

Athletic events equivalent to javelin throw and shot put could be designed as well! The longest sneeze, the loudest sneeze, the shortest sneeze, the heaviest head, the fuzziest/wooliest head et al. Do you think a marathon for ‘running noses’ could be organized as well?
ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa No harm in trying!

Not everyone is complaining though! Handkerchief and tissue manufacturers, small time doctors, pharmacists, cold remedial drug producers, alternative medical practitioners and pollution mask distributors are enjoying a steep rise in their sales, the Y-axis showing a consistent upward incline!

Conquering common cold may take a few more centuries; we can try at the most to minimize the spreading of the virus! Going back to the Indian ‘namasthe’ from the Global ‘handshake’ would

be good idea. If at all one MUST shake hands or kiss, antiseptic should be used before and after! Adding a few drops of dettol to the warm water along with salt might not be a bad idea! Forget the ‘strawberry’ flavoured lipstick kisses; just get used to ‘dettol flavour’! ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

No more need to slay dragons to win the hands of fair maidens; just conquering the common cold virus will do! And so the slogan goes,

‘brave the cold; take a hold; kill the germs; kiss the dames’! ha haaaaaaaaaaaaa Hail rhinovirus!

Post Courtesy:

Constant Research and Current Suffering! On a personal note! ha haaaaaaaaaa

Tags:

22 Comment(s) |

Share | Permalink [?] |

Rating:

[ Votes: 5 ]

Nov 30, '09

Damsel in Distress!

Disclaimer: This is NOT fiction; this is a TRUE story; a 'hot and happening' story!

Damsel in Distress!

Miya rose gracefully, shrugged off any remnants of lethargy that had set in out of having lazed around doing nothing for quite a while. She sprinted across the length of the corridor and reached the gate that divided her house and her neighbour’s. To say she stood there gazing at the handsome hunk on the other side would be an insult to her extremely suave self! For she did much more than that! She poised herself, not gaudily flaunting her assets, but very subtly flashed them across, like a professional display of quality wares in a shopping mall!

Oh yes! Miya was a femme fatale; and she knew it! She was dark, but that had never

bothered her. She was the most sought after female in her immediate neighbourhood; she was aware of it; charm oozed out of every single pore of hers! She was well endowed in the right places and there wasn’t a male heart that didn’t beat erratically as she sashayed down the road. Her rear swung this way and that, in the most provocative manner that sent the adrenalin pumping through the veins of hapless males!

Miya was desperate as she was ready for some action. She wanted to be noticed by this great dude across the gate; but try as she might, he didn’t seem to be interested. His ‘devil may care’

attitude pissed her off like never before; she swore to herself that she’d go to any lengths to seduce him, whatever it takes. But the guy was unflinching. He threw a casual glance at her and she was sure he hadn’t even registered her presence in his conscious mind! He took her in as if she was another piece of inane object around the place; just like the wooden fence; the gate; the walls! ‘MALES’, thought Miya, ‘are morons’. ‘What kind of a male was that who wasn’t aroused at the sight of a fair maiden who sent all the right signals? Maybe, it was a genetic trait; should find out about the family tree’, pondered a puzzled Miya. Talk of getting a low self-esteem! Poor Miya! She was used to being ogled at, pampered, and flirted with! This callous treatment threw her off balance! Her vanity and ego wouldn’t take it lying down!

Then came a bright, sunny day when Miya was to enjoy undivided attention! She noticed another handsome hunk moving into the other space that was vacant so far. Miya thought it was a relief to have another neighbour, who she hoped would break the staid monotony generated by the uninterested hunk. She was sure something was wrong with him, not to be enticed by her feminine wiles; she even doubted his masculine potentiality!

As luck would have it, the new hunk had all eyes on her! The minute he realized that he had a sexy neighbour, he made it a point to stay immaculate at all times. He tried to match her;

charm for charm; flirt for flirt; seduction for seduction! Miya was just abiding her time; for she was a typical female and didn’t believe in behaving like a bitch in heat! She didn’t want to come across too strongly! Of course, she wasn’t foolish enough to ignore him or give him a cold treatment, but played the mating game according to the book of rules – batting eyelids, throwing surreptitious glances, acting coy and yet alluring!

But what Miya was ill prepared for was the unexpected turn of events! That evening as she was lying down in her den, deviously planning her next move, she was intrigued by a funny noise that seemed to come from the direction of the new hunk’s space. She bounded out in a trice and to say she was taken aback at the sight that met her eyes would be an understatement. She saw the two hunks fighting with each other; fist-fighting; pawing at each other, trying to claw out the other’s eyes! She had no clue why they were behaving like hooligans; for she knew that they both had very decent family background, were well brought up and were well behaved males at all times!

It probably took competition to awaken the ‘male’ in him; it was probably a typical case of ‘ I don’t want, but you shouldn’t have it either’! Whatever it was, it had been addressed; all it needed was a trigger. It was after all a species trait – the male species! They are ever cautious about making their women happy, but woe betide anyone else who dares an attempt!
ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

They were almost barking off their heads at each other, and in the entire melee, Miya realized that they were actually warring over her! Oh boy! Did she feel smug! She settled down comfortably to watch the war of ownership! Of course, the winner got her, didn’t he? She didn’t mind either of the two; after all, she was the ‘hunted’, not the ‘hunter’! And she had no intention of running away from them!

She fell into a semi-trance, imagining a near-future romance with one of the hunks out there, getting all her wishes fulfilled! She saw herself wooed and won over; her every beck and call being answered by her most ‘obedient’ male escort!

But life wasn’t to be so, was it? Preetha had other plans for Miya. She wasn’t going to allow Miya to turn into a scarlet female; she had high values and ethics! So she firmly led Miya into her den, far away from the clutches of the two hankering males; and ensured that Miya didn’t cross the boundaries cordoned off by a solid gate and a strong lock! Miya sighed deeply and sadly, and with resignation, put her head down and drifted off into slumber land. Preetha may be able to thwart her plans in the physical world, but she couldn’t do much about it in her dreamland, could she?

And so Miya was left with her doggy dreams, safe inside her space of the day care kennel run by Preetha, while Shadow, the Great Dane and

Whisky, the Labrador outside continued their dueling, hoping to win the hand/paw of princess Miya!

Tags:

25 Comment(s) |

Share | Permalink [?] |

Rating:

[ Votes: 4 ]

Nov 29, '09

A Contemporary Fairy Tale!

Fairy Tales are not always made of fairies,fantasies and frill frocks; and it’s not just Cinderella, Goldilocks or Snow White who is the hero of such stories! There are amidst us, many a hero, who weaves a spell around us, in their own inimitable ways!

I was in Pune last week on work; and I met Sandeep.

Sandeep passed out of the tenth standard with a whopping ninety seven percent! At that point of time in life, he paused to consider options; he allowed himself two choices: 1. To continue education; 2. To launch a business! And he chose the second!

His father rendered financial support to buy a car. Sandeep then became the proud owner of a blue car and a ‘cab service’; initially, he played many roles – that of the proprietor, employer, employee, errand boy and telephone operator! Fourteen years later, he is now a business magnet, with eleven cars running the length and breadth of Pune city, with nine drivers employed under him and an exclusive, 24/7 ‘pre-paid’ taxi counter at the Pune airport!

This may sound familiar or repetitive; similar to that of several such success stories we happen upon in the course of our day-to-day interactions. It’s not the mere story line of the journey of his life, or his exalted financial status with a stupendous turnover of a few lakh per month that captured my attention. What impressed me about Sandeep was his clarity; he has an immensely well-defined and uncomplicated clarity of thoughts, expressions, goals, desires and principles!

How many of us would have been able to set ourselves at crossroads when we had just emerged out of high school? And how many of us would have had the nerve to opt out of

school at that age and stage of life? It was a ‘changing the course of life’ moment; and he was able to deal with it. Courage in self, we may find; but conviction? He found both, that enabled him to trod the ‘road not taken’; to explore the ‘unknown’; to experiment with that element called ‘risk’, which is instrumental in realizing dreams and desires!

The trainer in me saw a great potential in him; if only his English language skill was more in place, he would have been capable of training people, bringing about a positive difference in human lives! (he could still do it in places that doesn't need impeccable English). He hasn’t walked the corridors of Engineering Colleges, or B-Schools; no IITs or IIMs for him! And yet, he practices all the soft skills and leadership skills, within and without the textbooks!

When he made the most important decision of his life, he gave the world a typical instance of what we call in training jargon, PSDM – Problem Solving and Decision Making! When

he set targets and unflinchingly worked towards achieving them, he followed the principles of Goal Setting and SWOT analysis.

He has nine drivers working for him; yet, he doesn’t run his business sitting in a state-of-the-art cabin, at plush glass topped tables, with a personal assistant hovering over him. He is one of them, as he is always at the wheels of one of his vehicles, catering to the needs of his customers. That’s Leadership Skill at its best!

He has never been known to be late on a call. He says, ‘If you need the cab at 4 45, I’ll be there at 4 40 ma’am, not at 4 50’! And if he’s late due to contingencies such as traffic jams,

he calls you up immediately and informs you in a very professional tone, ‘I’m already on my way; just held up by traffic; I’ll be there in exactly 12 mins’! That’s being precise! And that’s Time Management and Customer Service, all rolled into one!

He’s very clear about his family goals too. I enquired him if his wife worked too. His words: ‘No ma’am. She’s not much educated. I’ve told her that her duty is to make the best khana at home, and take care of the kids’! He didn’t sound apologetic about it; and surprisingly , the ‘feminist’ in me didn’t rear its head in aggression! ha haaaaaaaaaaaaa For I realized that though he had the role of his wife ‘cut and dried’, he respected her deeply for what she was. He said that he had trained her in basic computer skills and she sometimes handled his e-mail communications when he ended up very busy. That’s the best demonstration of Motivation Skills. He spends time at home in the

afternoons and between 12 and 4 am; the rest of the time, he’s on duty. That’s Work-Life Balance in its purest form!

He laments about the ‘insincerity’ and lack of ‘honesty’ of his employees, even though he takes personal care to keep them happy and satisfied. He reflects on life and future and wishes that people learnt to look beyond pay-slips, greed and monetary satisfaction. And yet, he doesn’t quit; he strives to hold them a close-knit unit and hopes that they’ll fall into place! That’s the most practical application of Positive Attitude and Knowing Spirituality.

Talk of Communication Skills; he’s abreast with the fast-track world in that arena as well! He has acquired about six languages as he has customers from various Nations. He speaks

fairly good English; manages to communicate well. He speaks fluent Hindi and Marati. He has managed to pick up a smattering of Arabian and Gujarati. And though it’s challenging to find time, when he does, he goes to an institute and learns Spanish. WOW!

I’ll stop here, as we all reflect on that WOW! The world could certainly do with more

Sandeeps!

Tags:

31 Comment(s) |

Share | Permalink [?] |

Rating:

[ Votes: 5 ]

Nov 21, '09

Branded!

We have a Ms Hoity Doity in the family! The type that drops statements like, ‘I shop only at Shopper’s Stop’! ha haaaaaaaaaaa The type that gives ‘snooty’ looks at our homegrown ‘vermicelli’, but eats the same with a pompous flair if it’s given an Italian name like ‘Spaghetti’ or ‘Angel Hair’! A registered member of the ‘brand-o-manics’ club! Lol

Not that I’m averse to a pair of Levis Jeans or Fast Track watches or Revlon Lipsticks! In fact I’d love to shop for quality branded stuff. But that isn’t necessarily synonymous with snobbery! Nor the fact that I buy ‘Sony’ and ‘Canon’ means I scoff at second-in-line brands!

I’m tickled pink by the misplaced brand loyalty of the brand-o-manics; but I don’t feel amicable towards the user-unfriendly brand policies and after-sales service protocol! The training given

to the customer care executives is certainly not the same as the one given to the sales executives!

When you’re on an inspection tour, you’re made to feel like the most important person after God. But once the deal is made, and you’ve spent half a month’s salary, there’s a twist in the tale! No more immediate responses, no more ‘sirs’ and ‘madams’, no more smiling welcome, no more readiness and willingness! You make call after call, register complaint after complaint-----------but all you encounter are inefficiency and indifference!

I’m reminded of an anecdote I heard:

‘A man died and went up. He was allowed to choose between Heaven and Hell. Wow! He couldn’t believe his luck. He was given a dry run - one day in Heaven and one day in Hell. First he was sent to Hell. He was taken aback to see it was not at all the ‘Hell’ that he had read about in stories or seen in movies. He found wine, women and dancing everywhere; uncensored pleasure and unchecked freedom; no holds barred! The next day he was sent to Heaven. Heaven was pretty much predictable; Heavenly, but boring; too serene and sedate; no fun; too good to be exciting! Obviously, he chose Hell. And he went to Hell to stay. But what a rude shock he received, when he stepped into Hell as an inmate! He found the proverbial ‘devils with horns, some humans being fried in huge oil cauldrons, some being whip-lashed, souls screaming in anguish, gore and grime at every corner’! He demanded an explanation; and he got it! ‘Yesterday, we were campaigning; and now you’ve cast your vote’! ha haaaaaaaaaaaaa

Need I say more?

Recently, my laptop met with a casualty! I’ll spare you the ‘how’; the ‘what’ is that the LCD screen cracked and had to be replaced! Not a mean affair! I had just moved on from an old

fashioned IBM ThinkPad to a Dell Inspiron last July. But going by the law of probabilities, my laptop is out of the warranty period! I called up Dell customer care. If ever you need to give examples for ‘smart aleck policies’, you don’t have to look beyond these customer service rulebooks!

I was given two options! 1. Cost of LCD screen + service charges = Rs. 1500; and after payment of such a fancy sum, I had to wait for five to six weeks; of course, they don’t stock exotic things like LCD screens, do they?
2. They have a very ‘professional’ sounding scheme termed, ‘break fix warranty’ by which if I coughed up a sum of Rs. 18200, it would cover damage/accidents and whatever else you could think of, for a period of one year; in which case, the screen would be replaced in two days! The ‘executive’ who spoke to me was very particular to put across that the laptop would be replaced, even if I dropped it from the tenth floor of a building and broke it to smithereens! Looked like she was almost psyching me to do it! Bah! And when I asked if she practised ‘sorcery’ to produce LCD screens under this scheme when they were out of stock under the other scheme, she just mumbled something incomprehensible under her breath!

I did manage to find an unauthorized dealer who gave me a screen off-the-shelf, for a reasonable price and he managed it within a magical time frame of just two hours! And this is

proof of the ‘complications’ behind brands and the simplicity and solidarity behind second or third in line brands!

The moral of the story is that we need to learn by experience and play things by the ear; getting the balancing act together between the ‘brand new’ and the ‘grand old’; branded products are not to be boycotted as a rule; but the ‘when, where and what to buy’ is a different deal from ‘when, where and how to find service and spare parts’!

The serenity prayer might help here I guess; ‘God give me the wisdom to know the difference’! ha haaaaaaaaa

Tags:

35 Comment(s) |

Share | Permalink [?] |

Rating:

[ Votes: 5 ]

Nov 08, '09

Finding Love! Finding Life!

A friend challenged me to write a story; and a true love story variety! So, here it is! The result of my imaginative fantasy Tell me guys? Would I pass as a story teller?

Finding love! Finding life!

She came to! Wakefulness crept into her sleep sodden being; slowly bringing in a consciousness of the physical world; gently coaxing her to an awareness of the beginning of another day. Her eyes hadn’t opened; not yet. But she was aware of a wonderful feeling; a strange euphoria that she has been waking up with for nearly three months. She snuggled down deeper into the mattress, savouring the moment; the joy!

In that half-asleep, half-wakeful state, she tried to fathom the source of the feeling; the reason for her ecstasy. And then it rushed to her in wave after tidal wave; the indescribable sensation of ‘love’; of being in love! Her mind, heart and soul were instantly engulfed by thoughts of him. Her ‘him’ as she fondly told herself!

She?

She was a woman who’d come into her own; had carved a niche for her. One of those challenged-in-life, who took the world on its spinning axis when all the odds were stacked against her, and emerged with a doctorate in the journey of life. Following a happy, no-grouses childhood, she got married in her twenties. And like every other typical newly wed, went to live in her new home, her eyes sparkling, her heart singing, her soul dancing and her self trusting!

Alas! The bubbles burst too soon. No different a story from that of many a shattered dream, but when it is not a story you’re reading, or a movie you’re watching, it gets a little too close for comfort! To put it in the form of a précis, it was one of those unfortunate ‘arranged’ marriages, which left the girl’s parents feeling guilty for life! She found herself lost and lonely!

Days of depression, months of crying bouts, years of desolation! One morning she woke up telling herself, ‘enough is enough’! And then moved on; on and on; not a backward glance.

She was by nature a bubbly, spirited, smiling and loving bundle of enthusiasm. She didn’t have to practice at laughing; she was the ‘laughing her heart out’ sort! She hunted down her old friends; made new ones; got a job that was customized for her! She moved on from the state of ‘existence’ to that of ‘living’!

She was happy, no doubt. She was a fighter; an achiever. She loved and was loved in return by all her family and friends. She was a huge success in her chosen profession. She lived life to the fullest; when she smiled, it reached her eyes; when she laughed, it came from deep within her!

Yet----------------------

That niggling feeling of loneliness was a permanent presence in her! She couldn’t understand why she felt the need for a ‘man’ in her life. If it was for love, she had enough love showered on her. But she knew that she needed to be loved, wanted, cherished in a very special way; only the way a man could love, want and cherish a woman!

So the hunt began! Her quest for true love!

Men came; and men went! A few touched her heart, a few her body! But none touched her soul. Each time she fell in and out of a male experience, she was left with a strong sense of deja vu, a so-what’s-new feeling. She felt miserable; let alone finding someone to love her; there was no one willing to accept what she was offering; pure, unquestioning love! The men she came across had little or no need for such intensity!

She gave up;only the hope in men, not her love for life! Her experiences, her past and her undying spirit, all came together to take her to a higher plane of life; towards an evolution of the soul! She wanted to rise above the need; beyond the unceasing yearning for true love, if at all such a thing was!

It was easier said than done. She knew where she was; she knew where she wanted to reach; but the transition wasn’t taking place. The corroding away of her heart, trying to reach out, for a man who’d call her ‘his’, was eating at her insides; each passing day fanning the embers to an unquenchable inferno; scorching her soul in its flaming intensity!

And then she came upon him!

He?

He was a wonderful human being. What drew her to him were his calm demeanour, his subtle sense of humour, and above all his unceremonious attitude to life. She hadn’t realized it, but he’d captured her from within; she couldn’t point at a moment in time when exactly she had fallen in love with him, but she had! And the best part of the sensational story was that he was oblivious of her love for him! He had not the slightest inclination of her deep running feelings for him.

She wooed him for all her worth! She dropped hints; she dropped words during conversations; she dropped clues in his way; nothing worked! Finally, she had to drop her inhibitions; she had to drop her coyness! And blurt it out to him she did! So much for the romantic scenes that had played in her mind!

But providence had it that he responded in style! He accepted her hand, heart and love, wholeheartedly! She found herself going about in a stupor for a while; she couldn’t believe that she had been so blessed; that she had something so wonderfully unbelievable happening in her life!

But it wasn’t to be as smooth as she had believed it would be! He had his own story; his own compromises to make; his own ‘getting used to’ to be worked on. She understood his need for his ‘time and space’ and though she struggled a bit in the beginning, she learnt it; she learnt ‘him’; she learnt to pick up his moods from his tone, his words; even from his silence! She was a quick learner; a willing learner too!

She loved him with all of her being; the fist sized organ of 300 plus grams in her, beat only for him; she was amazed at her ‘teenage’ behaviour, while she had taken pride in her dignified and matured self! She found it unfamiliar, but comfortable and pleasant to forget herself and think of him instead!

What she loved about the experience was that it revealed hidden shades of herself to her! She had had to play the role of ‘man’ and ‘woman’ in her life as the situation had demanded it; the ‘man’ predominating more and more with the passage of time; the ‘woman’ pushed back to a dark corner, out of sight and therefore, out of mind too! But now, she was delighted to let the ‘woman’ emerge again; she enjoyed playing the ‘softer’ role; she was surprised to find herself smiling ‘ear to ear’ at having become his ‘yes’ woman! She loved the total surrender! Wasn’t that what she had always wanted!

And ever since that glorious afternoon he told her in his very matter-of-fact style the magic words, the magic moment had stayed in her heart, her mind, her being. And ever since she had woken up with euphoria in her heart, a song in her soul, a stupid grin on her face and a jig in her step!

There are times when she freezes though, a shiver running down her spine; could a ghost have walked over her grave? A tiny fluttering, somewhere in the lost folds of an unlit part, the remnants of insecurity of a forgotten past! Will he stay with her always? Will he be hers forever? Will he? Well, she believed in her God! He will never let her down! And with the tranquility that thought gave her, she woke up with euphoria in her heart, a song in her soul, a stupid grin on her face and a jig in her step, to face another beautiful day in her life; her life with him! Her ‘him’!

Tags:

38 Comment(s) |

Share | Permalink [?] |

Rating:

[ Votes: 9 ]

Nov 04, '09

The Upward Curve!

Is it really so difficult to smile? What do we hope to achieve by being grumpy? Do the facial muscles go on a causeless strike once too often? I’ve truly been baffled by people who can’t stretch their mouths a bit!

The other day, I was crossing the road at a signal and noticed this very serious looking face; ‘grim’ is not the word! He was dressed for work and had a laptop in his hand. I did give him the benefit of doubt; maybe, he was late for an important client meeting, or had an impossible deadline to meet! However many excuses I tried to find for him, I couldn’t for the life of me give him a verdict of ‘not guilty’! Surely, the world wasn’t coming to an end the next day!

As obsessed as I’m with the Queen’s lingo, so am I with that most wonderful expression that God has bestowed only on human beings. The physicality of a smile occurs in animals too,

which is labeled as a ‘snarl’ and implies ‘threat or warning’; in chimpanzees, the exposure of teeth is said to be an expression of ‘fear’. Only the homosapiens have been blessed with the feeling of felicity that’s experienced with a ‘smile’.

I smile; wherever I’m I smile. But I don’t receive a similar response from most. I try smiling at sales agents; shop floor executives; auto rickshaw drivers; street vendors; bus

conductors! Mmmmhhhhhhhhm! People either care two hoots or they raise a quizzical eyebrow rather pointedly at me, that questions my sanity! The air is electrified with discomfiture when you get into a lift. Have you tried smiling at people around you inside the lift? They hurriedly look away, focusing on anything that’s there to gaze at; some start revising numerals, counting the floors one by one! Some concentrate so much on the red arrows at the top of the lift that I wonder if it were some new form of meditation or memory improving technique!

At times I wonder if ‘facial paralysis’ is a common epidemic! The tiny muscles just don’t seem to be able to make those tiny movements!

What a difference a smile can do to your day! Especially the variety where the eyes go all crinkly small and bright! For the genuine smile is the one that reaches the eyes! Whether it’s a wide-mouthed grin, or a mere twitch of the lips, a smile that’s reflected in the eyes is worth the world and more!

Give me a smiley e-con any day to that of the supposedly intriguing smile of Mona Lisa! I’ve never been able to comprehend the world going gaga over that smile! Perhaps, I’m artistically challenged! Siggggghhhhhhhhh

I take the cliché, ‘if you find someone without a smile, give him one’ very seriously; I do try my best to give a smile to as many as possible, but people are just not interested in accepting it!

I find it very amusing when I come across certain professionals who think that smiling is below their dignity. I’m yet to come across a ‘jolly goodfellow’ banker; they are born grim I

guess; is not being able to smile a pre-requisite for landing a job at a bank? ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa And you have some professors who are conditioned to believe that the ‘grimmer’ they are, the more respect they get! Government officials may not know how the word is spelt! Some may not even be aware of the existence of such a word or the very action itself! Bah!

Is it such a rare commodity? I’m afraid it’s getting close to being listed under the ‘endangered species’! And like various other ‘saving’ campaigns, should we embark on a ‘save the smile’ drive? We do have a ‘world smile day’ (first Friday of October) that commemorates Harvey Ball, who was the artist of the first smiley face. Oh my! That portends more danger! Everyone would smile only once a year!

Smile oozes confidence. Smile wins hearts; smile wins jobs; smile wins big time. I often ask my trainees, ‘when do we smile’? They reply, ‘when we’re happy’. I tell them (of course with a smile), ‘it’s the other way round; when you smile, you’ll never be able to be sad’!

Research says that a ‘smile’ produces more of what you call ‘fun chemicals’, like ‘dopomine’ and ‘seratonin’ and stimulates the well being of the body. So why miss the opportunity?

Stand in front of the mirror and smile; a beaming, radiant face peers at you, doesn’t it? And makes you feel ever so good, doesn’t it? So what are you waiting for? Go ahead! Forget the frown! Just smile the world to a spin!

Oh! Incidentally, the study of laughing and

laughter is known as ‘gelotology’!

I found a lovely clipping on youtube of Charlie Chaplin and a song on smile. Fropper doesn't allow video uploads. I've given the URL here. Go watch and enjoy--------------with a SMILE!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iu-rLA4POkI

Tags:

35 Comment(s) |

Share | Permalink [?] |

Rating:

[ Votes: 6 ]

About Me

chithrajust's ezBlog