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Total Replies: 8 |
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Topic: My Marriage stfer 10 years...  |
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 29 Oct 2009 12:54 am | #1 |
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Dunno when and where tension catches me... Its like a never ending cycle of conquering one and then comes the next. I am used to this now. But this particular tension doesn't seem to leave me at all. It started around ten months back and is still dancing in my head. Doesn't let me sleep, eat, nor even concentrate on my work. The sole thought now is that what happens next.
My Marriage... thats my biggest tension now. 
No... I am not dying to get married. Its the opposite. My parents are dying to get me married off and in the process, sufforcating me to death. And so, in the process, i am the one who's 'Dying' in this marriage.
It started last January, when some great great Enlightened One told my parents that I have to be married off this year or else, my marriage would take another 10 years...
Wow...!! Thanks O Enlightened One. You screwed up my life so well. If you have that great power of foreseeing the future, why cant you foresee your own and escape...?? For sure, your death is written in my hands.
And so, from the past 10 months, innumerous proposals, 4 meetings and uncountable advices have shattered me. I move and meet the next morning with the only confidence that, God saved me last time. This time again, I'll be saved.
But I am dreaded...Will I not get married for 10 years, good God...??
Lini...
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| 29 Oct 2009 06:28 pm | #2 |
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hi lini, read your post The problem that you r facing is the most common problem faced by young gals n guys who hav attained the marriageable age. The problem in your current situation is Dilemma... u r not ready for marriage....and also u fear what if u dont get married for the next 10 yrs?. The solution lies in the answer of the question: whether you want to get married or not in life? If yes, then wholeheartedly go for it now. discuss the issue, with all your choices etc with your parents. And take it positively that anything done by taking the parents in confidence is always right for the rest of the life. look at a who child never wants to go to school but can the parents ever leave it to child to remain at home?...........answer is no. Its duty of the parents to send their child to school and get him educated. Similarly your parents have also lived a life and no matter you may be extremely intelligent, knowledgeable and can understand things better, the wisdom your parents can not be doubted. Any right thing done in time, in the right way is right. I dont believe in the astrologer's words.. but i believe that time has approached for you to get married and start a happy married life and have a good family. only thing is whom to get married to? this troubles everyone. decision on one particular person will not materialize until u r sure "he is the guy made for u".. and it here u can listen to your inner voice on a person and use the wisdom of your parents. whether now or later, it is u who will decide. whenever u decide to go for marriage it will happen. With wishes for blessings of God and lot of good luck to u raj
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| 29 Oct 2009 11:54 pm | #3 |
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Hello Lini,
Its easier said than done, but lemme share some piece of suggestion...pls do not think abt it at all, just keep doing your good work, n leave rest to God if you strongly believe in Him.
we all need to be karma Yogis in life...meaning keep doing the good job, dutiful job...in the best way possible..with full attention, concentration, n best efforts.Its the problem blown up out of proportion by attaching it so much importance really.some times the perceptions become too big to the real issues n their sizes.
Its part of mind games, we keep playing with ourselves really. No one can change the designs of the destiny, not even the purest n truest Astrologers...take everything that comes your way as part of life in a stride, again easier said than done, but pls put in your best efforts to follow this path, you will lead much happier life, keep laughing at it..n let it go...however in the way, if something good proposal comes, pls think seriously n take quicker decision...
we all at Fropper wish the best of luck...i am sure God will also bless you...
with lotsa luv n support,
ess.mohan
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| 30 Oct 2009 06:02 pm | #4 |
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Hi Lini
Warm Greetings. I refer to the captioned topic and like to share some thoughts in my mind.
First & foremost, your parents have a social obligation to get their beloved daughter married to a handsome & respectable guy. Secondly, with the advancement of age, as u may b aware, the individual gets lesser preference against other budding young girls in queue, and we ourself outdated. Whilst boys need not worry much about their age, it is definitely a matter of concern for girls. Thirdly, if you r to worry about late marriage, then u certainly need to get married at the earliest. Unlike earlier days, girls getting married does not mean their liberty is at stake. In most instances, the married girls are definitely in par with boys and enjoy enough freedom in public, specially when it comes to joining / contining their jobs.
Even if u were to marry after 10 Years, the tensiion is tremendous - both to you and your parents / relatives as well. Thus going for marriage now is wise, irrespective of advise from others.
I do support u that the thought of and preparing for the "marriage" is always daunting. Me too as a male, had undergone this trauma. So don't worry, tensions are bound to be there. Take it as it comes, andtry to resolve it.
Wish you all the very best for your future.
Regards
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| 14 Nov 2009 02:14 am | #5 |
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funny how every small thing can bring in so much tension into a woman's life,yes wearer of the shoe knows where it pinches,see ur already a woman,i guess its better not for males and females to get married now,just cohabit and go their own ways,the burden of being a bahu being demanding on a woman and being a provider chaining a man boy o boy
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| 15 Nov 2009 10:01 pm | #6 |
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My yoga teacher in Lucknow was 24 when I became her pupil early last year. One of the sweetest girls I have known in all these years. Her English was near enough NIL. Although she had done a diploma course in yoga in local university - she knew very little about the theory, Chakras Nadis etc. So it was a wonderful relationship of tutor-pupil and pupil doubling up as tutor. Like most girls of that age she confided in me all her fears and anxieties. She asked me why I had never got officallly married and I explained it to her satisfaction. She had a similar problem without the 10 year delay sword hanging over her head. She admitted frankly she had no time for kids and couldnt quite see why she had to get married as she was self supporting. She also wondered about "love marriage" and "arranged marriage" like most Indian girls do - EVEN IN ENGLAND. I personally feel that young Indians between 18 and 26-27 are the proverbial "Dhobhi ka gadha na ghar ka na ghat ka". As she was 90% Desi and only 10% "Phorein" I was able to clear her doubts by warning her that if she did not have any kids then unless she had an iron will she will start having problems after 30 and it will get worse with every passing year. As far as "love" was bothering her I told her frankly that considering she had come so close to me and had I not known how to handle her and myself - WE WOULD BOTH HAVE what is commonly called "FALLEN IN LOVE". I think that made her understand this business of love. I then explained to her the real reasons behind Hindu "arranged marriage" and western style "love marriage". It all boils down to the belief that a woman in "love" grants her consent on a 'spiritual level' and in arranged marriage by 'compulsion'. On balance she would be better off arranged. This February she got married and she doesnt seem miserable or unhappy to me. I hope I advised her correctly.
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| 16 Nov 2009 01:32 pm | #7 |
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A little known catch about "astrological and similar prophecies". If you BELIEVE in the veracity of these then more often that not YOUR ATTITUDE/RESPONSE to events WILL CAUSE YOU TO BRING ABOUT THE FORECAST as a SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY. This is the simple trick used by the "police etc" in almost all countries by MAKING YOU FEEL GUILTY via Interrogation techniques so that your replies might bring about your "conviction" even if you are NOT GUILTY. Hope this additional information helps. Personally, I always look up the "Daily forecast" LAST THING AT NIGHT which is almost by 12 AM. Unfortunately, with the forecast extending to 10 years this is not possible BUT we all have the mental power and attributes to conquer such "fears". Same way a GOOD forecast can bring about a "self-fulfilling" prophecy. Why not obtain a second opinion which might be the opposite of the bad one. In fact I am told that these astrologers can be PAID to forecast what the person giving the "GHOOSE" wants you to do - especially in matters of marriage - like making a Kundali mismatch a GOOD MATCH. Best of luck.
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| 22 Nov 2009 11:51 pm | #8 |
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Hi Lini....
The other side of the Grass will always be Green....Evergreen to be frank !
Marriage infact binds two souls into one.If you are able to come across a Good Guy who can really match to your wavelength please give the Green signal and proceed immediately
GOD knows whether the Globe itself will survive the next 10 years or not !!! Then why to wait for the next 10 years if you are mentally prepared to become Mrs.Lini ! you should act Fast and be Productive too !
Awaiting your Wedding Invitation soon.
GOD BLESS ! Take Care !
Cheers
Lollu
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