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Posted on: Jul 29, '08

You know you are watching an Indian soap opera when...

1) The name of the show is longer than Hum Aapke Hain Kaun + Hum Aapke Dil Mein Rehte Hain + Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam + Kyunki Main Jhooth Nahin Bolta.

2) When there are more vamps and villains in the show than all the actors, directors, technicians, spot boys, make up artistes, drivers, dogs on the sets put together.

3) When girls and guys are single in the show for not more than 10 episodes. They need an excuse to showcase lavish sets and have some naach gaana, hence the wedding .

4) When all the characters live with their respective chacha-chachi, mama-mami, masa-maasi, foofa-foofi and also maasi ke devar ki saali ki bua ke jethh ke beta and beti... all in the same house.

5) When women look like a walking catalog of Parag sari and wear more jewelry than Bappi Lahiri.

6) When episodes alternate between aarti-puja and jagraata, wedding and murder every day.

7) The average life span of the character is 106 years, 4 months, 20 days, 18 hours, 9 minutes 39 seconds and 55 nano seconds. Then they are reborn at times.

8) Plastic surgeries in each show outnumber those of Bollywood actresses ever.

9) If you got ALL the characters of the show under one roof, you could fill up a tabelaa.

10) If you got all the women characters under one roof, you'd feel like trying to get in a second class compartment of 9 am Virar fast local... at Borivali.

11) The most often repeated words are parivaar, khandaan, maan maryada, sanskar, thakurji / rab/ mataji / mata maharaj / muraari, mummyji, baauji, 'main tumhe barbaad kar dungi', 'mera ek hi maqsad hai - iss parivaar se badla'.

12) Every character has been married 10 times. To 5 different characters and 5 times to the original spouse.

13) The only sensible character in the show is the old dude who hangs on the wall inside a photo frame... sensible because he doesn't talk at all.

14) The only way you can bear them is when you are too drunk to realize what's happening... And you become an alcoholic as an outcome.

15) The jerky camera work makes you feel like you have a severe case of vertigo.

16) There are more slaps in the show than karate chops in a Jackie Chan movie.

I'm sure there can be lots more to the list... Please write them down in the comments.

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ASYLUM said:

excellent Nova.

Soaps just kill my sense of humor.

July 30, '08

notjustart said:

Wish there was an icon that could express the maddening laughter this post created. While I was reading and laughing,(actually laughing and reading!), my colleagues almost called a mental hospital to come take me with them! I was hysterical...! Great post Dhaval...Ya I am scratching my head to come out with another to add here...let me think...

July 30, '08

Novacaine said:
Sunshine!! This is AWESOMMEEE! khee khee khee

July 30, '08

Sunshine_Is_Here said:
Here's another one : 'When you actually start counting the number of the lead characters' step brothers n sisters in comparison with the number of those of ur pet dog's real ones!!!

July 30, '08

MARKIV14 said:
true picture u have depicted...

Thanks for sharing.

Ciao

July 29, '08

Nike_123 said:
nice!

July 29, '08

dogtag666 said:
hey nice one.....nova...hers another one...wen u turn ur head from left to right thirteen times wen some one tell u a masala news...

July 29, '08

soundspot said:
and i loved number 13. so true. so true. sniff...

July 29, '08

soundspot said:
when there are more tears and sad laments in one episode than all the dirges of the Romantic poets. especially on happy occasions.

July 29, '08

Bharathselvan said:
read to me instead of to ke in the first line.

July 29, '08

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