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Posted on: Sep 24, '08

Biscuit Baba learns a new method of Kundalini Awakening

It was one of those lazy daisy days, sun shining brightly and birds twittering in the trees.

Biscuit Baba and I were having a satsangh in a meadow. As usual, with chai and glucose biscuits -- Biscuit Baba's dakshina and prasad -- the glucose biscuits I mean, not the chai.

"So Baba, how are things with you?" I asked, eager to know news of Biscuit Baba, since we were meeting after a long haitus.

"Well baccha, I couldn't keep away from the Himalayas any more, so I went on my usual pilgrimage. The Himalayas are indeed the home of the Gods baccha!" Biscuit Baba said reverently.

"Hmm...yeah, I should think so" I agreed.

"And what have you been up to in the meanwhile baccha?" Biscuit Baba asked.

"I have been meeting a few men from Rockker Relationship Baba." I replied.

"What's that? A Rock group?" Biscuit Baba inquired.

"No, no! It's a social networking site where you can meet potential mates, or just make friends. I registered my profile in the section for relationships, which is supposed to be for meeting potential mates or forming some serious relationship" I explained.

"Oh! Well, that's good! So have you formed any serious relationships yet baccha?" Biscuit Baba asked.

"No Baba. I met five men and they all were a disappointment. Every one of them!" I said. "Though I've made it very clear that I don't want to have any relationship with married men other than being friends, these guys led me on and then when we met the truth finally came out." I was disgusted remembering the hoodwinking nature of those men.

"In what way? What truth?" Biscuit Baba asked.

"Well, four of them said they were separated, and when we met I found out that what they meant by being separated is working in a place that is away from where their wives live. And on this ground they wanted to have a physically intimate relationship with some women! Naturally, I was incensed!"

"But why baccha?" Biscuit Baba asked. "These men were technically right na? After all, they ARE separated -- from their wives! And having once tasted the fruit of the conjugal bed, such men would find abstinence difficult I suppose..."

"Even worse was the fifth one Baba!" I said. "When we met, he gave me a lot of gyaan about not wanting to build a relationship on lies, and admitted that all the time we corresponded by mail, he had been doing just that! The guy is married, living with his wife!"

"Really??" Biscuit Baba seemed amazed. "And this maha-purush wanted to take on another woman?" A menancing note crept into Biscuit Baba's tone. "Where is he now? I would really like to meet him."

"I don't know where any of them are now Baba." I replied. "After meeting them I felt they are in need of spiritual awakening, so I helped their Kundalini Chakra to rise. After that I have not seen hide or hair of them even on the net. Probably they've headed for the hills to become sages or saints."

In the past, while sharing interesting news with Biscuit Baba, whenever I expected him to sit up and take notice, or get excited, Biscuit Baba has been disappointingly placid. So I had given up on such expectations. Imagine my surprise then, when Biscuit Baba on hearing my news put down his mug of tea and looked at me with amazement writ all over his face.

"FIVE MEN??" Biscuit Baba seemed agast. "Just what did you do? Teach them pranayam or had sex with them?"

"Neither. Both these methods are too 'iffy' Baba." I said. "My way is absolutely garaunteed to give results."

"Baccha!" Biscuit Baba drove an anxious hand through his hair. "Just tell me. I've braced myself."

"Why don't I give you a demo Baba?" I asked.

"NO!" I doubt if even the Big Bang experiment would be able to match Biscuit Baba's explosion. "I pefer to hear it from you in words baccha."

"Well Baba, they say that the Kundalini Chakra is at the base of the spine, and awakening it makes it move upwards, thus making the subject spiritually evolved, right?" I asked.

"Yes, yes!" Biscuit Baba couldn't seem to get over his agitation. "Just tell me what YOU did!"

"I simply kicked them hard on the base of their spines, and their Kundalini was awakened." I replied

"WHAT??" I wouldn't be surprised to know that some new galaxy has been created as a result of Biscuit Baba's outburst. Birds flew off the trees, a few fruits fell to the ground, along with two squirells and a monkey.

"Look Baba!" I said, pointing excitedly. "You've awakened the monkey's Kundalini Chakra now! See the glazed look on it, like the universe is unfolding before its eyes?? That's exactly how those five guys looked after receiving the kick!"

For a moment I thought a motorcyclist nearby was having trouble with his scooter, judging from the sputtering sounds I could hear. I looked around, eager to be of assistance, when I realised that the sounds came from Biscuit Baba.

Biscuit Baba had taken a sip of chai, perhaps in an effort to calm himself and suddenly started laughing helplessly. Thus the sputtering sounds.

"Baba?" I asked tentatively.

"I was just thinking about what the sages of ancient India would have to say about your method of helping spiritual evolution baccha" Biscuit Baba said as he collapsed on the ground.

Tags: humour, spirituality, relationship

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Chiktu said:
Good nd hilarious.Day dreaming therapy is advisable when one cant actually do th things. Gives th same satisfaction without actually doing it. Its a diappointment that only 5 persons nd a monkey has benefitted.

Dagnysharma's popcorns r also amusing.Why, these seem like real reasons, some opportunistic men may b using it as excuses, doesn't mean they r all false. Such things happen reason being uncaring,unimaginative or Self centered wives.

Good Blog. Buiscuit Baba character is nice for dialongue base.The blog serves th purpose of showing th furiocity of disappointed women, hence successful. Can be rated 5 stars.

December 02, '08

RainwaterCAP said:

F U N T A S T I C L E S S O N S O N M O R A L I T Y VIA SHADOW CHARACTER OF BISCUIT BABA, THE MEANS AND THE END ARE WELL CONNECTED TO THE SAFETY FACTOR OF GIRLS YOU NEED TO OPEN AN INSTITUTE FOR GIRLS SELF HELP GUIDANCE , NICE WRITTING KEEP IT UP.

November 14, '08

rashbhu said:

Fantasticaly written. Hope those 5 guys got the Gyaan from ur activation of Kundalini chakra Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!. Hey Now I got confirmed that Kundalini chakra has such power.

November 05, '08

dagnysharma said:
Manisha,

I wont compliment you on your writing skills. They are out of the world and I have told you that already... many many times...

I'll talk instead about the the pseudo-single guys... or the pseudo-seperated ones.

You will have noticed, they all have the same refrain.

- They dont sleep with their wives... if you look naive enough they will even tell you they are virgins yet... bah..!!

- That they have NEEDS that their wife never understood... or addressed...

- That they are with their wife ONLY because they love their kids so much... YEAH RIGHT..!! Didnt we hear somewhere that the best way for a man to love his kids is to love the mother?

In short the 'oh-she-doesnt-appreciate-me' song. Man...!! It is Soooo bloody BORING...!!

Do they think we are fools..? Or do they fondly imagine they are the first men we ever met...?

Seriously...!!!<br />
And so Kundali awakening..! Yes... !!!

He he he....

Cheers babe... more power to your pen...

Dagny

October 29, '08

suchislife_ia said:
Ha! I love it. Wonderful writing.

October 25, '08

Gutz24 said:
OH My GOODNESS you not only have the flair of making me cry but laugh too......Amazing versatality....Manisha...What a wonderful way to awake one's KUNDALINI.

Vatsyana the erudite mature scholar would have been just too amused to add this to his yogic postures of Sex Ka GYANAN!

AWAKEN YOUR KUNDILINI CHAKRA THRO SEX CHAKRA alias Swadishtana (EK pyalli chai ki ho..uske saath biscut bhi ho)Chakra.Awesome post.Love you for kicking those men where it hurts the most.Proud of you Baby......

October 25, '08

Garret2000 said:
FABulous..

October 23, '08

vidyut_strikes said:
Well, you've tempted me back again. Not just that, you've inspired me. I need to awaken a few Kundalinis urgently.

October 20, '08

ladyinred17 said:
And what an awakening that would have been, never forgotten. They got what they deserved, a kick in the butt.

Have never understood the reason to fib about the relationship status and take a woman for a royal ride. Some men shall never learn.

Fantastic post, Manisha.

tc.

October 14, '08

Energywisdom said:
Awakening of the Kundalini is far from your reach and you even dont know the Place... dont try to make ur kundalini an ashtray...

October 13, '08

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