RELATIONSHIP AND OUR EXISTENCE

Beleive it or not,relationships are central to our existence,yet no close relationship is simple or can be taken for granted. Building a healthy relationship needs work, patience, tolerance and compasion. Relationships are one of the most difficult areas of human life. The closer the ties, the harder are the challanges . A great deal of our happiness and sorrows arises from these relationship. People nearest to us such as spouse, parents, children , close friends are usually the source of our deepest anxieties,fears, insecurities and unhappiness or pain as indeed they are of joy,love support,comfort guidance and ever liberaton

If relationships are so central to our existence as human being, if they can infact make or break us,then what is the secret of getting them right. If only we knew this, we might not only prevent sorrows from happening but actually create a good deal of happiness and finally find a way of being at peace with ourselves and with others. There is ofcourse no simple answer to this complicated question 

Relationship is like labyrinths,each choice  leads to many others. Every mistake is magnified,every error multiplied until in the end we find ourselves completely lost. We wonder, where did we go wrong? What could we have done better , why did we waste all those years and how can we rectify the mistake 

To approach this complex problem we must start with basics . First of all we have to understand that no intimate relationship is simple or can be taken for granted It needs a lot of work,patience , tolerance and compassion.Loving the other person makes them feel safe and removes the insecurities and suspicions. They stop being angry or retaliatory,but how can we love so devotedly and one sided when we ourselves are needy and depleted and look to the others to quench our thirst for love. Ofcourse this is the key issue in every relationship what we seek from the others is what lack ourselves. partial, incomplete and inadequete We seek completion,adequecy through others and usually end up being disappointed.That is because others expect the same from us. In a clash of expectation,many a relationships fail 

There are some relationships that seem to be impossible if not exceptionally difficult. Someone we are closely connected with becomes hard to deal with in such cases We need to remember that this person is part of our life,perhaps because there is an unpaid,"karmic debt" that we owe him/her and therefore we should discharge this debt with joyous detachment if possible rather than a sorrowfull resistance 

We can view whatever happens to us by being either purely accidental or that there is a method in it .Infact every thing does or eventually make sense. If we behave later,we we know that we have chosen every test and trial that we face. 

If so, it is our duty to do the best in every situation by offering a quiet supportive love to the other,irrespective of what we get in return.Ofcourse sometimes it is also necessary towithdraw entirely from a person and to break free from a relationship that we know is damaging to us in the long run. On the other hand, if we can affirm,renew and release what is positive in that relationship,it is never too late to mend it, and thereby free ourselves from repeating it's trauma.and both will be happy in the long run.

Tags: relationship is a part of our existence

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