It was the place they called Flickering Lights
across the street from Wuthering Heights
but after Cathy and Heathcliff
while dancing in the biff
appeared on Dancing With The Stars
getting thoroughly sloshed in cocktail bars
that the Heights was then put up for sale
until it got crushed by a flying whale.

Now all that remains are Flickering Lights
for gone to pieces is Wuthering Heights
Now Flickering Lights is owned
by Nathaniel Groaned
the CEO of Not So General Electric
whose stock trading is quite eclectic
From Wall Street to Broadway
his stocks are down
following power outages
all over town.

It was a dark and stormy night
and Nat was sleeping tight
when lights flickered on
and the chess board
moved its own chess pawn
then lights flickered off
and there was a ghostly cough
for Doctor Buckley's does not help the spirits of the dead
nor remove a nasal cold from a ghostly head.

Coughing and wheezing
and ectoplasmic sneezing
never in history was a haunting so sick
then Groucho Marx's spirit started doing his schtick.

"Enough is enough!"
Nat's voice sounded rough
the enitre house was enveloped in ghostly clusters
who was he gonna call? Why, Ghostbusters!

There was Nathan de Burgh Polar Bear Private Eye
whose hairs on his white fur coat reached the sky
when he heard a ghostly wheeze
followed by a spirited sneeze
which caused even the polar bear
to turn cold and freeze.

"Stop acting like a PC!"
he felt a tap on the knee
it was Jack O' Hare
his partner in time
holding a sliced kiwi
along with some lime.

"I googled this on my Mac,"
said Jack with little tac.
With kiwi and lime
(say doesn't that rhyme?)
he sang so sublime
a Gregorian chant
with medieval cant
pre-Vatican Two
it worked through and through.

Holy kiwi, holy lime
just in the nick of time
these fruits blessed with Holy Water and morning dew
and an exorcism prayer of Saint Matthew
drove off these ghosts with their annoying flu.



The End.

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