The three magical words!!

AAh !! Stumped you !! Give your love soaked minds the much desired rest..Its not about those THREE words..Its about THE three words which often had married men and love smitten bachelors ducking for cover or quivering as if stripped of all the wisdom, that they thought they had acquired, through their nappy to trouser days...!!

Here goes..

After much struggle and numerous delays we finally got married. Its a different matter that our marriage ceremony looked like a battle field with armies standing on both sides of the hall, but then marriage it was..We were finally destined for a life full of bliss. I had hired a Cielo ( those days IT was the car)..bedecked with flowers to take my Girlfriend(oops wifey) back home!! Past midnight and after bribing the pandit to finish off the whole mantra show quickly..we were in that car alone.I couldn't control my happinees and said," Whoopeee Sweet heart...there, we have done it!! Though on hindsight, I would have said the same to my teammates after winning a tough cricket match..but anyways..its a guy thing... 
Now to my utter dismay, she was sniffing and there were tears in her eyes. 
Now what is that, I asked her," Are you hurt somewhere."
She looked at me in amazement and sniffed more.
"You are not a girl". she sniffed more. " YOU WON'T UNDERSTAND".
So, the readers get the picture now...... These are the magical three words..that had been hurled at me right left and centre and believe me  till now, I , havent got the hang of it.

Another one...

A young collegue of mine , a passout of an ivy league college and a gold medalist at that..had everything in her that could make her the top honcho one day, except for one thing..She wanted to take on a sumo wrestler one day ( Its strictly my understanding) and she was one of those ivy league types who believed that facial and bodyhair have to be shaved once in two years..C'mon you cant help noticing these things..( Lady readers forgive and forget!!). 

Now a young fellow from the international business division fell for her hairy charm...( Cheap guffaws). 

Obviously the fellow must have been brought up with daily advices on the  brain conquering everything and The pen is mightier than sword and similar sayings conveying blah..blah ..blah! 
The girl was a great friend of mine and told me about the proposal.

"So, what have you decided." I asked
"I need time, easygo, thats what I told him", says she.
Time my foot! I shouted," He is good looking, has a great career ahead and you need time." 
"C'mon", I added, just in case she hasn't understood the whole thing," You, of all the people should be jumping in joy." Pretty insensitive, but thats the way I am..Keep myself balanced with two chips on either shoulders. 
She looked up at me and said," I forgive you for these words, I know you too well." But then what she said had me jumping for cover...
" You are not a women." said she, " YOU won't understand."

Still another one

My friend philosopher and guide has a daughter, who actually grew up from a girl in pigtails to a beautiful and charming teenager. Often when he was on tour, I had to sometimes pick her up and drop her to college. On one such occassion, just before a festival, I had to take her out to the market for some essentials. To my dismay the girl came dressed in shorts and  tee. 
O.K , uncle, she said," Lets go."
"Go where." I asked.
Mom  gave me a list, " To market of course", said she.
I hesitated. Toyed with car keys..Looked here and there..and she examined me with arms akimbo.
"What the matter?" Said she.
"Well, I think", I told her ," You realise it is 7:00 pm and we going to the crowded central market, not to a mall."
She was enjoying this..She smiled and said," So what"
" I was...er..er..wondering, if you are appropriately dressed." said I. thereby placing all cards on the table.
She ACTUALLY laughed.
" You are such a sweetheart, uncle!" C'mon lets go......And then " You wont understand"

So there, I rest my case..The words come out from ladies of all shapes and sizes..and all ages......And no male can understand.

Q.E.D.

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